


Phil Coulson's Housewife

by Tales_from_a_mockingbird



Series: Two Agents In Love [2]
Category: Marvel Avengers Movies Universe, The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Blow Jobs, Coulson knows how to make everything all better, Crossdressing, Dirty Talk, Feels, Hand Jobs, M/M, insecure!Clint
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-10-14
Updated: 2012-10-26
Packaged: 2017-11-16 07:13:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/536867
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tales_from_a_mockingbird/pseuds/Tales_from_a_mockingbird
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clint Barton doesn't like masks...so what happens when his next assignment is to go undercover at a Masquerade Ball? Plenty of feelings and nerves for Phil to fix as well as Natasha convincing Clint to wear a dress to the ball (what are partners for after all?) While Clint is hesitant to wear the dress at first when Phil has a rather positive reaction to it he decides to use it his advantage and smut ensures!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Why Clint Barton Doesn't Like Masquerade Balls

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters or SHIELD they are the property of marvel, I just enjoying playing with them :)   
> A BIG thank you to Mel for starting this by not being able to get the image of Clint in a dress out of her head and also for being wonderful and proof reading it for me :)

I’ve never liked masks. A person who had to wear a mask was afraid of others finding out about their actions. Criminals wore masks because they were evil and the world didn't need to see the face of evil, they did however need to see the face of good; which is why I strongly opposed the idea when Coulson first spoke to me about wearing a mask. I never felt like I needed to hide who I was when I was on the wrong path, so why should I when I’m finally doing good? Some SHIELD agents wore masks and not that I thought any less of them but I was glad Natasha didn't wear a mask; I just couldn't trust anyone to be my partner if they were constantly hiding. 

With my mask aversion as strong as ever, Coulson announcing that our next mission was a masquerade ball brought little joy to me. Natasha, however, seemed thrilled at the news; she had one of her rare girly moments and broke into a long speech about the perfect dress she had to wear and how much fun this was going to be. As usual she payed very little attention what I was doing and the fact the I was slowly slumping lower and lower in my chair, just wishing for the ground to swallow me up. It wasn't that I hadn't ever been to one, it’s just that I hated the feeling of not being able to recognise anyone and no one really being themselves; when you put a mask on someone they have a tendency to become a whole different person. Phil perceptive as ever, noticed my discomfort immediately and sent me a worried look as Natasha babbled on about jewellery and where she was going to put her gun. The briefing continued pretty much like that; Natasha and Phil hammered out the details while I sat there praying that Phil didn't ask to see me after the meeting. Of course with my luck, the moment the meeting ended he asked me to stay.

“Yes, Agent Coulson?” I asked putting on my best professional tone.

“I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that it’s not the thought of having to slow dance with Natasha that’s got you less than eager to go on this mission.” He took a few steps towards me and sat on the corner of the desk in front of me.

“Hey you haven’t had to and with her; I stepped on her toe once and she broke my foot. Have ever had to waltz with a broken foot? It’s not a barrel of laughs.” I tried to joke, hoping to switch the subject.

“Clint. I’m not asking as your handler” Phil reached for my hand “I’m asking as a concerned man who can see his boyfriend is upset and wants to help him.” 

“I just don’t like masks okay; it’s stupid.” I mumbled not meeting his eyes.

“Nothing about you could ever be stupid.” The sincerity in Phil’s voice made my heart ache; how did I get so lucky to end up with the only person on the planet who thought there was more to me than a cheap laugh?

“I don’t like it when people pretend to be something there not. It’s hard enough to get to know people without giving them something to hide behind. The idea of being in a room full of people who think there a no consequences for their actions just because I can’t see their face freaks me out; I mean how is that any different than the bad guys we go after?” I paused trying to work up the courage to say my other reason, after several moments however I finished lamely with a cheery “so that’s why Clint Barton doesn't like Masquerade balls; see you later.”

Phil kept his eyes on me and made no move to let go of my hand. Feeling my chest tighten I tried to ignore the way his loving stare made my pulse quicken; nobody had looked at me like that in my entire life and Phil made it seem as if it was the most natural thing in the world. We’d been together long enough for him to know my buttons; first he would stare, then he would run circles on my palm and then would come the dreaded disappointed sigh that would break me; I couldn't stand disappointing Phil, I’d literally go to the ends of the earth to make this man in front of me happy. Slowly his thumb starting moving in circles and I decided to break early.

“Masks also make me remember that people aren't always what they claim to be. Sometimes I worry everyone around me is wearing a mask and that when I need them I’ll realize they weren't really there for me at all.” I slowly brought my yes up to meet his “I worry that one day I’ll realize you never loved me; that everything you told me was fake. Because to be perfectly honest with you Phil it makes no sense why the greatest man I’ve ever met would fall in love with me.”

Phil’s eyes were filled with sadness as he leaned forward and captured my lips in a feather light kiss. One of his hands moved up to stroke my cheek as we parted; smiling at him I was caught by the surprise when the other went for my fly! While we had fooled around at work before, we had never done anything once we were assigned a case; that was our distinction between ‘working’ and simply being at work. My moral side put up a good argument that I should tell Phil we had promised to be professional while working and he should really stop unzipping my pants; but in what reality would I seriously tell Phil to move his hands away from my fly? 

“I shall just have to show you then, why you’re so irresistible to me” Phil growled slipping his hand inside the confines of my pants.

“I think I have a pretty good idea already” I chuckled, pushing my hips off the chair to get closer to his hand.

“Really?” he asked slipping his hands out of my boxers.

“No!” I groaned bucking my hips up “please Phil, I need you” I whined.

“And you will have me. But seeming as you've once again proved you have a one track mind, I’m going to have to take this slowly.”

“Usually I’d say you can have me anyway you want, but we have a mission to start; so wouldn't it make more sense to just fuck me now and we can share our feelings later?” I tried to reason and grabbed the collar of Phil’s shirt to pull him back down to me and kissed him hungrily.

“Table. Now.” He panted; the lust in his eyes sent tingles through my body.

Smirking I hopped out of the chair and went to remove my pants before laying on the conference table. 

“Keep those on” Phil ordered.

Phil joined me as I spread myself out on the dark wood table and once I was comfortable kneeled between my legs. He lent forward until his hands where on the table both sides of my head and lent in and kissed me softly. I reached up to try and deepen it but as soon as my tongue left my lips he had moved his head down to my shoulder and began to kiss down my bicep.

“I love your strong arms, but not just because of your muscles. Every time I see them they remind me of how you put your life on the line to save people and that you choose to do this job because you think it’s right and never look for anything in return; because you truly are just that amazing.” He moved across to the other one, but this time sucked a dark purple mark onto my shoulder before kissing down to the tips of my fingers and saying “When you wrap them around me I feel the safest I've ever been, even safer than when your protecting me with your bow; because I know that once you've got me in your arms, you’re never going to let anything take me.”

His hand slipped down to my chest and unzipped my shirt. I didn't think it was possible to get any harder than I already was but as Phil’s hand scrapped over one of my nipples I could feel my cock stiffen even more. When he moved his lips to my chest and began to kiss a line from the base of my neck to beginning of my open pants I couldn't help the deep moan that escaped my lips. 

“Do you want to know what else I love about you?” he asked raising his head at the elastic of my boxers.

“God. Yes.” I pant, trying to keep myself from coming in my pants like a teenager.

“Well I love this most of all” he said smiling and placed a hand over my heart “because I know it belongs to me; just as mine belongs to you.”

“What else?” I choked out, painfully aware that Phil’s lips were just centimeters away from my cock.

“Your eyes” he murmured, moving back up my body and pressing his erection flush against mine; sending shocks of pleasure throughout my body. “I love how their always dilated when they look at me; it reminds me that while Natasha may wear a leather bodysuit and can kick her leg above her head you still prefer me in my stuffy suit.”  
“Always you” I breathed, grinding my hips up to get more of that delicious friction.

“And those lips; while they may be giving me sass half the time, they also kiss me good morning and manage to know exactly what I need to hear.” 

Phil pressed his lips to mine and immediately I could feel his tongue stroke my lips asking for entrance. Opening my mouth, my tongue was quickly entwined with his as our hips continued to move in sync. Moaning loudly, I grasped the back of Phil’s head and held him down to me as my tongue explored every inch of his mouth; relishing the little noises I coaxed out of him as I slightly scraped his tongue with my teeth.

“You know another part of me is feeling a little let down you didn’t mention it” I thrust my hips up for emphasis.

“Ah but you already knew I loved you for that” he chuckled; thrusting down just as hard and causing my eyes to roll back.

“Yes but it always enjoys hearing how you love it” a predatory grin on my face I flipped us over “how much you need it, how good it feels when I’m fucking you” I purred speeding up my thrusts.

“Clint, I’m close”

“I know sweet heart. I know, going to take such good care of you; just like you did for me. Now just lie back and enjoy it.” I drawled, bending down to nip at the underside of Phil’s chin while unbuckling his belt.

Reaching inside his trousers I grab his cock and gently rub up and down the length, putting my lips to Phil’s I swallow his moans as I increase my pressure slightly. I manoeuvred myself so that I could keep one hand on Phil and get my pants and boxers down. 

“Lift your hips up darling” 

When Phil complied I set quickly to work on pushing his boxers and trousers down and within minutes I had my hand wrapped around both our cocks.

“Gonna make a mess of you darling, gonna have you screaming my name so loud the good citizens of New York back down on the ground are going to hear you come apart for me” I promised, gritting my teeth in pleasure as I sped up my movements.

It wasn't long after that I heard Phil moan my name and felt a warm splash on my stomach; hearing my name out of Phil’s mouth in that tone always sent me over the edge and soon I was joining him. 

“So Agent Barton; you ready to start the mission” Phil panted, stroking my hair.

“Bring it on Agent Coulson” I challenged smirking. 

The sound of Phil’s phone ringing brought us back to reality and we quickly untangled and started getting dressed. I zipped up my jacket as Phil answered his phone and I was once again in awe of how amazing this man was; he was talking business with Fury as if he had spent the last 20 minutes doing boring paperwork rather than being pinned breathless and desperate to the conference room table coming hard underneath me. Stepping close to him I placed a sweet kiss to his cheek and motioned that I was about to leave. Sending me a smile he nodded and turned his back to me and continued talking to Fury about the upcoming mission. Stepping outside the door I was surprised to see Natasha leaning against the corridor; a knowing smile plastered across her face.

“What are you so happy about?” I ask trying to remain calm; there’s no way she was standing there the whole time, she went off to find lip gloss and tiara’s and whatever else girls liked; why would she come back here? 

“Just enjoying the view” she chuckled looking me up and down suspiciously.

“Sorry honey, but you’re not my type” I snarked not thinking.

“Oh and I know who exactly is your type” her tone predatory, she stalked towards me “middle aged, wears a suit; now who does that remind me of?” she mused and pushed me against the wall with her foot.

“Look I’m sorry if your hurt I didn’t tell you okay; but I haven’t told anybody.” I explained.

“I’m not just anybody Clint” Natasha admonished “I thought we were close, I mean you didn’t kill me back in Russia; but I guess I was wrong.” She sighed over dramatically and dropped her foot. “I guess I understand I mean all Phil really is, is the love of your life; not like it’s important or anything. Not something you would want to share with your...best friend.”

Damn her! She knew playing the ‘best friend’ card got her anything she wanted and now instead of enjoying post orgasmic bliss I had to suck up to her.

“I’m really sorry Nat. I didn’t know it meant that much to you; if I’d had known it was going to hurt you, I would have told you immediately after it happened.” I sighed.

“Yes well there’s nothing you can do about that now, so I guess I just have to remain heartbroken” she sniffed; the mischievous glint in her eye told me she was up to something but for the life of me I couldn’t figure out what. 

“Of course I’ll do anything to make it up to you” I swore; that being the standard reply in situations like this. 

The minute the words left my mouth an evil smirk crossed her lips and she cheerfully replied “Brilliant! Then you’ll wear my dress to the ball.”

“Do you even know what the word ‘undercover’ means? Don’t you think a guy dressed in drag might stand out?” I spluttered, desperately trying to get out of this; it wasn't the idea of being in a dress that freaked me out; it was the idea of Natasha picking out a dress for me that was terrifying. 

“It’s a costume masquerade ball stupid!” she teased “God you really didn’t listen to anything in there did you?”

“I was a little preoccupied by my inner turmoil; but don’t worry I’ll be sure to just push it down some more; because that’s totally healthy” I ground out death staring her.

“Oh cheer up Clint; I’ll make sure to pick a dress Phil will love you in” she cackled and turned to go down the hallway.

“Oh great’ I sighed as I watched her gleefully skip away from me.


	2. Clint Barton Looks Totally Hot In Fishnet Stockings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natasha makes Clint try on the dress..with some surprising results

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: once again I don't own them, they belong to Marvel.
> 
> Thank you to Mel for proof reading and anyone who is a fan of Garter belts owes her a thanks as well because they were her idea :)

At least it was black. I had half been expecting a pink frilly number knowing Natasha’s sense of humour. In all honesty it wasn’t that bad; it was a full length black gown with a low v neck and on the shoulders it had some sort of gold clip. I eyed it suspiciously as Natasha rummaged through her draws; I wasn’t allowing myself to think of what she could possibly be looking for. I was running my hand down the sides of the dress when a problem suddenly occurred to me. 

“Where am I going to keep my arrows?” I asked.

“You know there’s this amazing new invention called stockings where you can hide things Clint; where the hell did you think I kept my gun?” 

“I honestly tried not to think about it” I murmured.

“Well Coulson really has done a number on you hasn’t he? When we first met you were at least a little bit curious about what I kept under my dress” she mused.

“I have never been interested in you or your dresses” I argue shocked that she thought I was able to think of anyone but Phil; it wasn’t until I turned around and saw the smirk on her face that I realized I’d been played.

“I knew it! I knew there had to have been something going on between you two when I met you. I convinced myself I imagined it but Coulson was jealous of me when we met wasn’t he; I saw it in his eyes.”

“Let’s change the subject” I try; Natasha had been interrogating me ever since we got back to her place for information about my relationship and up until now I had managed to not spill anything.

“Oh come on Clint” she sighed stepping forward and wrapping her arms around my shoulders “I just want to get excited and girly with you, I can run downstairs and grab cosmo and tell you how to make Coulson propose if you want?”

The toothy grin across Natasha’s features was radiant; she genuinely just wanted to celebrate my relationship. Sighing I stepped back and settled on the edge of her bed and prepared myself for the most intimate game of 20 questions of my life.

“We weren’t together when you met me; but I was in love with him” I revealed, my gaze never leaving hers.

“When did it happen?” she asked as she crouched in front of me. 

“When Fury had you hitting SHIELD agents to the floor like flies Phil and I decided to talk about what happened. As I was sitting there I just kept waiting for the words ‘you’re fired’ to leave those beautiful lips; but they never came. Instead he told me I was in love with you” Natasha raised her eye brows at my statement but listened patiently “His exact words, I think I recall were; ‘Barton, SHIELD is a secret agency dedicated to protecting the world from evil-not a dating service. The next time you decide to fall in love with a pretty girl do it on your own time.’ I’d never seen him look so mad; and I’d done some things to piss him off, believe me” I chuckled.

“What happened next?”Natasha pressed learning closer 

“I realised he was jealous and my heart skipped a beat at the implications. I finally worked up enough courage to do what I should have done the minute I laid eyes on him; I walked around the table and kissed him” 

“And then...” Natasha urged desperately

“And then what happened after that is none of your business” I teased; relishing the look of annoyance on her face.

“I will get the filthy, sordid details out of you Barton; I promise” she threatened and returned to her dresser.

“But not today” I clarified; the smirk wiped off my face when she turned around holding a packet of fishnet stockings.

“No not today, today you get to play model for me” she grinned, slinking towards me.

“I don’t think that’s such a good idea; you wouldn’t want to ruin the surprise would you?” I gulped.

“Get naked and get in the dress” she deadpanned “And if you don’t move in the next 30 seconds then I won’t let you have the privacy of the bathroom” she threatened.

I quickly grabbed the dress, stockings and headed for the bathroom down the hall. As I closed the door the dress suddenly felt incredibly heavy in my arms. Ashamed at my self consciousness I told myself to stop being such a sissy and put the damn dress on. I’d never felt self conscious before I met Phil, never saw the point of it until I got a taste of the lust those blue eyes could hold if I wore the right outfit. Now every time I got dressed I tried to outdo my last effort. 

Unzipping my jacket I tried to not think of the last time that happened today; the last thing I needed was to go out there and see Natasha with a massive hard on. Flinging it on the ground I started on my pants and soon I was naked except for my boxers and glaring at the dress hanging on the shower door. 

“Put the stockings on first” I heard Natasha say from behind the door.

“You’re supposed to be in the bedroom” I accused.

“Your taking too long” she whined.

“It’s been like two minutes” 

“Fine. I’ll go downstairs and watch TV and wait for you to man up.”'

I didn’t make a move for the stockings until I heard her walking down the staircase. Opening the packet I slowly rolled one leg up and slipped my foot into it, stretching it out along my leg I was surprised to find that the black actually went quite nicely with my skin tone. Once I had the stockings up to my mid thigh I fastened the garter belt around my waist and attached the stockings. When everything was in order I checked myself out in her full length mirror and assessed that I actually looked kind of hot in fishnets; except there was no way my arrows were going to fit here, and Natasha would have to have them on her. I took a deep breath and crossed the room to get the dress and bring it back to the mirror. Holding it up in front of me I allowed myself a moment to sway back and forth enjoying how the dress moved. I closed my eyes and slipped it on over my head. Steadying my breathing I slowly opened them and was shocked at my reflection; the dress looked even better on. The V neck ended just after my pecs making them look even more muscular, the cut really slimmed my hips and because there were no sleeves the muscles on my arms really stood out.

“God I’m turning into Natasha” I laughed.

Walking out of the bathroom I was surprised at the confidence in my step. Reaching the end of the stairs I made my way towards the living room where I could hear the sounds of the evening news; did that woman ever watch anything fun? I cleared my throat and waited at the doorway for Natasha to turn around. 

“Wow!” she exclaimed, her mouth hanging open.

“What do you think?” I asked and gave a little twirl.

“You look hot” she complimented walking towards me “I should have made you do this ages ago. Now just for the finishing touches.”

“Finishing touches?” I queried.

“Oh don’t look so worried Clint; just some shoes, hair and of course your mask” she smirked picking up a bag on the coffee table next to me.

“What’s wrong with my hair?” I asked slightly insulted.

“Nothing; it just you make such a pretty girl and you deserve some beautiful long locks” she cooed pulling a long brown wig out of the bag and placing it on my head.

“It kind of itches” I complained scratching my head.

She swatted my hand “Don’t scratch. Now lift your dress up” she ordered taking out a shoe box. 

The giant pair of heels she pulled out of the shoe box made me gulp; they were black with small straps and a thin heel.

“You’re not expecting me to wear those are you?”

“Stop being such a baby” she reprimanded putting my foot into the right shoe.

“Men aren’t supposed to wear heels” I protested trying to get used to my new height.

“You’re so pathetic” Natasha grumbled strapping me into the left one. “All done” she beamed standing up.

“Great” I murmured trying not to fall over.

“Now for your beautiful mask” 

“Please don’t make this anymore painful than it already is” I pleaded.

“Okay, okay. Lift your hair up” she fastened the mask around my head and walked me to the mirror.

The mask was plain black and velvet; quite beautiful if you forgot what it represented. With my new height I towered over Natasha and the wig curled slightly around my shoulders and face. Truth be told I could barely recognise myself. I ran my hand down my side and admired the pretty scene that played out in the reflection; it looked as if there were two women standing in Natasha’s living room and one was about to go to the ball and meet her handsome prince. Smiling I thought of Phil and wondered what he would think; while he wouldn’t physically see me in the dress before the mission he would see me on the surveillance cameras. I hoped his blue eyes would darken with lust as he saw me glide across the dance floor with Natasha and see my dress twist and turn as we danced.

“He’s going to love you in it” she whispered meeting my gaze in the mirror.

“I think you might just be right for once” I teased.

“Now take that off, go home and do whatever it is you two love birds do. We leave at 0200 tomorrow” she shooed, walking towards her kitchen.

Not taking my eyes off my reflection I chuckled; Phil was going to have a hell of a time staying professional tomorrow.


	3. Clint Barton Is Too Attractive For His Own Good

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's mission time! Natasha escorts Clint to the ball, Phil has some naughty fun with Clint over the ear pieces and there is sensual eating of asparagus; so all in all just your typical S.H.I.E.L.D mission!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own them Marvel has the privilege I just like to make up adventures for them to go on :)
> 
> A big thank you to Mel for not only proof reading but also thinking of very entertaining comment names, and I take full responsibility for making asparagus the sexy vegetable, so if you don't find it attractive sorry!

Natasha was Robin Hood. I was stuck as the world’s hottest drag queen and she got to be the most famous archer in history. Her excuse of it being the only way to smuggle in my bow and arrow was not helping my view of the situation. All my life I dreamed of being Robin Hood and instead I was wearing heels and a wig. It didn’t help matters that Coulson hadn’t mentioned my dress yet; I was starting to feel as if this was a mistake and I looked like an idiot who should just stick to shooting things. As we entered the hall I was impressed with how classy it looked; I mean, we were here to arrest a drug lord and they’re not usually the most tasteful of people.

“Keep it together Barton” Natasha hissed pinching discreetly under my arm

“What are you talking about?” I asked trying to ignore the very painful stinging sensation.

“You look like you’re about to run for the exit. Whatever inner turmoil you’re having just keep it to yourself okay?” her sharp tone told me it was an order, not a question. She pulled me to a nearby table where two older couples were already sitting.

“Sorry, I didn’t realize it was showing” I apologized pulling out her chair and then taking the seat next to her.

I made sure to arrange myself into a mask of pure tranquility as the lights dimmed. The ball started off with some big pompous speech about how the host (our unfortunate target) was thankful to be able to spend nights like this with his friends (us I’m assuming) in such beautiful surroundings. He made a couple of bad jokes that everyone dutifully laughed at and told us that we should ‘eat and enjoy’. The entree arrived seconds after he finished speaking; some sort of clear soup with vegetables in it. Patting my hair down over my ears to cover my ear piece I began to eat.

“Careful baby, you don’t want to ruin that lovely new dress, do you?” I heard Coulson purr in my ear.

Sitting up straight I tried not to let the shock on my face show; was Phil seriously going to talk dirty to me in the middle of a mission, in a crowded ballroom? 

“You look beautiful tonight kitten. It’s been driving me crazy watching you, not being able to touch. I just had to say something.” 

Taking little sips of my soup I tried not show how Phil’s words affected me; the confession that he liked the dress got my pulse racing and I’d never felt more confident in my life. Natasha started polite conversation with the man sitting across from her who had been trying to look down her shirt since we sat down; it still amazed me how sweet and innocent she could act while on missions. As usual nobody was paying much attention to me when you went on missions with a woman who looked like Nat, well you got used to people’s eyes being other places. 

“Natasha told me a secret before you left your hotel room” Phil said huskily “she told me you were wearing fishnet stockings and a garter belt. Is that true baby? Are you all dressed up for me under there? When I take you back to my hotel room after this will you let me see them kitten?”

I thanked my lucky stars that I was the one in the dress instead of tight leather pants as I could feel myself harden at Phil’s words. Trying to slow my breathing down I focused on the near empty bowl of soup in front of me. I heard Natasha introduce me to a lady covered in gaudy fake jewellery but all I could do was nod my head politely and shoot her a quick charming smile; afraid that my voice would show my arousal. I scanned the room quickly for our target and found him sitting at a table in the back corner; the seats filled with an array of young women. A hand appeared seemingly out of nowhere and whisked away my bowl, leaving in its place a small plate of beef, mashed potato and asparagus. Lifting a piece of meat to my mouth I heard Phil in my ear again.

“Naw my poor baby, they don’t give you very big portions do they? Well don’t worry love I’ve got something that will fill you up later.”

The double-entendre’ had me chocking on my beef. Natasha shot me a suspicious look but soon turned back to her meal. Jesus Christ what was Phil trying to do, kill me? I felt a pair of eyes on me and found gaudy jewellery lady staring at me; I put on my best friendly face and smiled at her until she looked away. Turning my attention back to my plate I began to eat my mashed potato; no choking danger there. 

“You look absolutely adorable in a formal setting; one day I am taking you to the classiest restaurant in all of New York, and if you’re good I’ll even buy you a new dress” Phil promised.

Reaching for my wine I attempted to disguise my blush. While refilling my glass I was struck with an idea; time for some pay back. Picking up my fork I brought one stalk of asparagus to my lips and slowly swallowed it down; inch by inch. 

“You trying to make me hard baby?” Phil asked “I’ve been hard since the moment you came up on screen. But by all means I’m not going to stop the show.”  
Grinning I made sure the rest of the table was in deep conversation before I discreetly picked up the asparagus and sucked it leisurely through my lips; the sound of Phil’s breath hitching was music to my ears.

“Would you swallow me like that if I was there? Is that what you want kitten, my hard cock filling your mouth?”

Suppressing a moan I reached for my glass again and gave a little nod. I left my last piece of asparagus untouched; afraid I would cum in my boxers if I pushed Phil any further. Turning to face Natasha I noticed she was staring away from the table; following her eye sight I saw what she was gazing at. The target was eyeing her up like a piece of meat and Natasha was all eye lash flutters and smouldering stares for him. The attendants came out again and cleared the plates, when the table was empty large plates of pastries, éclairs, chocolate and glace fruit were set out in the centre. Eagerly reaching for the plate of éclairs I found my hand pulled away and suddenly I was standing.

“Oh c’mon you know éclairs are my favourite” I whined as Natasha pulled me onto the dance floor.

“You have to watch your figure if you want to wear a dress like that again. Now dance with me.” 

Resting one hand on her hip and the other on her shoulder we began to sway slowly back and forth. While there may have been many positives to wearing the dress, there was one downside I was quickly discovering; I had never danced in a dress before. I wasn’t used to all the material pooling around my feet or the extra height from the heels. I was quite a good dancer as well, today however I just staggered around trying not to fall over.

“Put your arms around my neck” Natasha hissed.

“I already feel enough like a girl, I don’t need to dance like one” I argued, keeping my hands firmly in place.

Natasha leant in close and put her lips to my ear “Barton, so help me God if you don’t put your arms around my neck I will break each of your fingers with a hammer and you won’t be able to shoot anything for months” she whispered.

Begrudgingly I wrapped my arms around her neck and let her pull me close. We stayed like that for a couple of songs before Natasha felt the expected tap on her shoulder. Just as planned it was our target who wanted to dance with her.

“May I have the next dance” he asked; his eyes firmly set on me!

Stunned I could feel my mouth gaping as I tried to answer; this was not a scenario I had planned for tonight. Natasha came to my rescue and said some bullshit about me being shy and told him I’d ‘love’ to dance with him. She quickly scurried off after that to get into position. Feeling the man’s hands around my waist I presumed once again I was the girl and rested mine on his shoulders. 

“You look lovely” he commented; eyeing me up and down.

“Thank you, you look quite handsome yourself sir” I made my accent more pronounced; Phil once told me I was irresistible when I let it shine through, hopefully it was the same for this guy.

We danced for the rest of the song in silence and to my pleasure he remained the perfect gentleman; his hands didn’t leave my waist. While he wasn’t as good looking as Phil he wasn’t terribly ugly either. Even though I was wearing heels he was still a good head taller than me and had short blonde hair. Physically he was on the lanky side but his arms felt a little muscular so I figured he could throw a pretty good punch if it came down to it. 

“Why don’t we get out of here and go some place a little more private?” he asked nipping my ear painfully.

“What about outside, it’s getting kind of hot in here” I offered; Natasha would be waiting in a nearby tree with sniper rifle for when I gave her the signal.

“Whatever you want angel” he groped my ass and pulled me towards the exit.

I couldn’t walk as fast as usual in heels so it took us a few minutes to make our way out to the garden. It wasn’t very well kept; there were weeds everywhere and grass only grew in sparse patches on the ground. He led me towards a large tree in the centre and shoved me against the trunk. 

“Careful tiger” I warned.

“Sorry I just can’t keep my hands to myself around you” he ran a finger down my chest.

“Well I’m very flattered” I lied and tried to figure out how to get out of his embrace; the moment I was clear I knew Natasha would take him out.

“You don’t have to be shy around me handsome” he growled leaning towards me.

I knew I had to think fast or was going to have to make out with this awful man; not that it would have been the first time I had to get a little physical for a mission but this guy had no romantic talent whatsoever and would probably end up choking me to death on his tongue. Feeling his arousal at my stomach I was suddenly hit with an idea. 

“Isn’t there somewhere else you’d rather I kiss” I drawled reaching for his belt.

“Well, look at you going for gold; I’m not gonna stop you sweetheart” 

When I dropped to my knees I was suddenly met with a face full of crotch as the target slumped against the tree. I pushed him off me and examined the bullet wound; some of Natasha’s best work. After I dragged him behind the tree I waited for the S.H.I.E.L.D agents on surveillance to come and collect the body. They showed up a minute later and bagged up the body; I never asked what happened after, I always figured that was never a part of my job. 

“You did good Clint” Natasha patted me on the back as I hoped in the van.

“You didn’t too bad yourself; not that you had to do anything! Why the hell did he go after me anyway?” I asked trying to forget about the way he looked at me; Natasha may be used to being gawked at but I certainly wasn’t.

“Because you look irresistible in that dress” Coulson appeared out of nowhere and the lust in his eyes told me I was in for quite the night.


	4. Phil Coulson: The Only Guy In The World Who Could Be Patient With a Raging Hard On.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All work and no play makes a Clint a very dull boy, so now that the work is over it's time for play!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Unfortunately I don't own them Marvel does, my fics are just what goes through my head 90% of the day :)
> 
> A MASSIVE thank you to Mel for proofing and even adding her own little bits :)

I loved Phil’s tongue. Whether it was kissing up my neck, licking down my chest or lapping at the vein in my cock that he knows drives me wild, it was always amazing. Right now it was doing things inside my mouth that had me moaning shamelessly. After we had dropped Natasha off, Phil and I raced back to the hotel so quickly that I would be surprised if there wasn’t a ticket on Fury’s desk Monday morning. Phil pounced on me the moment we were through the door, not that I was complaining because I couldn’t think of a better place to be than pinned to the wall with Phil against me. 

“You look so stunning” he breathed resting his forehead against mine.

“Thank you” I panted and captured his lips for another searing kiss.

I started tugging at the suit jacket he was wearing; hoping he would get the hint and take it off. Chuckling he removed his arms from around me and shrugged the jacket onto the floor. Smiling I went for the buttons on his white shirt, nipping his bottom lip each time I got one undone. I ran my hand down the planes of his chest and nuzzled under his neck playfully. Phil’s hand came up behind my head and stroked my neck.

“You ready to show me what your hiding kitten” he whispered, his tone loving.

For practically the first time in my life I froze in a sexual situation. Burying my facer deep into Phil’s neck I tried to get a hold of myself. Rationally I knew Phil was so turned on that I could do the Hokey Pokey and he’d probably react as if it were a lap dance. But all the insecure side of me could think of was that while Phil might be turned on, I was embarrassingly the hardest I had ever been in my life. I didn’t know if it was the presence of the dress or whether the hours of teasing from Phil had pushed me to the edge, but I was a little terrified to find out. While I had no problem being gay and my lust for cock did nothing to discredit my masculinity, the idea of liking a dress, however, did make me feel a bit like a freak. It felt so different than standing in Natasha’s living room; back there it was all fun and games, I loved Phil with all my heart and I didn’t want my weirdness to screw this up.

“You don’t need to be shy baby.” He cooed running his fingers through my hair. “Hey what happened to that confident sex kitten I had before? Doesn’t he want to come out and play with me? Because I would very much like to play with him”

Screwing my eyes shut I wished for Natasha to burst through the door and announce some evil world power had created ninja monkeys or something and we were needed immediately to fight them. To my displeasure the door stayed intact and Phil continued to stroke my neck and patiently waited for my reply; just my luck to end up with the only guy in the word who could be patient with a raging hard on.

“You’re not embarrassed are you baby?” he asked softly.

“No” I grumbled unconvincingly.

“Baby, look at me” he lifted my head up to look at him “Oh kitten, you look like you have blush on” he commented leaning forward to kiss each of my burning cheeks. “What are you embarrassed about?”

I cast my eyes down to the floor; wishing it would open up and swallow me. The last thing I needed today was Phil’s sympathy, everything had been going so well and I had to ruin it.

“Well if you’re not going to tell me I guess I’ll have to work it out on my own.” He eyed me shrewdly. “Well you’re definitely not embarrassed about how you look” he mused. “Only incredibly handsome men get hit on by major drug lords...or is that what it is?” his lips formed a perfect O. “Baby you can’t blame him for being attracted to you; practically every man and woman in the room was undressing you with their eyes.”

While I seriously doubted what Phil was saying was true, I didn’t push it; I was already in enough trouble as it was. I simply shook my head to tell him I wasn’t embarrassed about that.

He had a mischievous glint in his eyes as he spoke “Hmm well if it’s not that...then it must be this.” His hand shot out and cupped my erection.

I was so sensitive that Phil’s hand around me felt like the most incredible hand job ever.

“Kitten I love that you love dress. Do you want to know why?” I nodded “because I’ve been dreaming about you in one for months.” 

My eyes snapped up; did Phil just say he’s wanted me in a dress for months?

“Why didn’t you tell me?” I demanded; if Phil wanted something sexually it was my right as his boyfriend to be able to provide it.

“Because I was worried you would freak out” he explained. “I’ve never been happier in life than when I am with you Clint and I didn’t want to jeopardise it over a stupid fantasy.” 

Suddenly I felt the tables turn; just like with our first kiss I had the power now, and I sure as hell was going to use it.

“Sweetheart nothing about you could ever be stupid; certainly not something as delicious’ as this.” My confidence brimming I licked the outer shell of Phil’s ear and purred “wasn’t there something you promised me earlier? I’d really like to collect on that now.”

“Do anything you want” he ground out, needy and barely moving in case he came apart at the seams. 

Dropping to my knee’s I quickly undid Phil’s pants and released his cock from the confines of his boxers. He really did have an amazing cock. It wasn’t the longest I’d had, but it was definitely the thickest. Wrapping my fingers round, I slowly moved up and down - just the way he liked it. I had him panting, and gave him a moment to breathe before I descended my lips and suctioned onto the tip. I lightly sucked before taking half of him into my mouth. 

It had surprised me the first time I gave head to a guy how much I enjoyed it. There was just something about the fullness of my mouth that I loved, and the little noises I could coax out of big strong men; I liked Phil’s noises the best though. He was always so responsive to me.

Running the tip of my tongue down his slit, Phil hissed in pleasure above me. Smiling I took him deeper and sucked hard. His hands tangled through my hair as he begged for more. Bobbing my head up and down Phil’s length I breathed in his scent; that was another thing I loved about Phil, his smell really turned me on.

“Baby if you keep going like that I won’t be able deliver on my other promise.” He warned with a trembling voice, running his fingers gently through my hair.  
While it was incredibly tempting to just finish him off in my mouth, I was in desperate need of Phil to fuck me. So I pulled of slowly and smiled up at him.

“You wanna fuck me darling?” I drawled my accent thick. “You gonna undress me? Lay me on the bed and have me screaming your name?” I rose off the floor and shot Phil my best innocent eyes “Coz I’d really like it if you did.”

Phil gulped noticeably before answering “your wish is my command.”

He brought his hands up to my shoulders and slowly moved the straps of the dress down.

“You truly are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen” 

Blushing I tried to bow my head but Phil caught my chin.

“Never be ashamed of your beauty baby.” He manoeuvred my arms out of the dress and caressed the fabric pooling at my waist. “you know I’m lucky. Most girls who wear a dress like this, their figure is 90% Spanx. You just keep getting better under the dress.”

“Ready for your favourite part?” I asked as I licked my lips seductively.

“Go on Kitten show me what you’ve got for me.”

I dropped the material and watched the dress fall around my ankles; revealing my stocking clad legs. Phil’s breath hitched and his eyes travelled up and down my lower half.

“Oh baby this is better than I ever imagined. Look at you, all dressed up for me to play with.” He knelt in front of me and placed a trail of hot kisses down my thighs. “Natasha should have bought you a pair of panties too; yeah you’d look hot in black lace panties.”

Moaning as Phil mouthed my leaking cock through my boxers I choked out a strangled ‘fuck me’.

“Soon love, let me have my fun first.” His teeth lightly nibbled the straps connecting the stockings and garter belt “did you have any trouble getting them on angel?” he asked and licked the length of the right strap.

My words failed me so I shook my head and continued watching him; I couldn’t take my eyes off of the sight in front of me. 

“I didn’t think you would, I mean by the looks of this they were made for you.” He ran his hand down my right leg and moaned in appreciation when I flexed my calf beneath his fingers. “On the bed baby” he growled.

As I sprawled myself out on the double bed I relaxed into the pillows; if I wasn’t so turned on I could have easily fallen asleep the bed was so comfy. Phil quickly joined me and began to massage my left leg. Phil’s fingers felt incredible as they kneaded the muscles in my thighs, and I couldn’t hold back the low moan as I pushed my head back into the pillows. 

“Lift your leg up” he whispered.

As I complied, Phil bent down and placed a kiss to my ankle before slipping off my shoe. He then undid the strap and slowly rolled the stocking down my leg, pressing a soft peck to my skin as each inch of flesh was uncovered. He gestured for me to do the same with my right leg, and I don’t think I’ve ever moved quicker. After both my legs were bare he crawled up, so he was lying on directly on top of me and reached around my back to unbuckle the garter belt. Phil ran his index finger lightly down my straining erection and captured my lips in a passionate kiss. My groan was swallowed by Phil’s tongue as he massaged the inside of my mouth gently. Desperate to have Phil inside me I slipped my boxers down to my thighs and to my joy Phil’s hands quickly finished removing them for me. 

“You want me baby?” Phil teased and playfully traced the length of my nose.

“Please” I begged, bucking my hips up so our naked cocks brushed against each other.

“Spread” he whisper in my ear sent chills down my spine.

As I parted my thighs Phil hopped off the bed to get the lubricant and a condom. He rejoined me and positioned himself with his head was above my crotch. I enjoyed watching Phil stretch me, because he always got this adorable look of concentration on his features at first but when I started whimpering a mischievous grin took over because he knew he was close to my prostate, and would then proceed to attack it mercilessly. The cool drip of the lubricant ran down my crack as Phil’s finger gently probed my entrance. 

“Relax baby” Phil cooed “you feel so good, so tight around my finger, just perfect.”

Taking a deep breath I relaxed completely and soon Phil was adding a second digit. A small whimper escaped my lips as Phil’s tips lightly brushed my prostate, the mischievous grin firmly in place Phil’s fingers began to stroke my prostate; alternating between long slow strokes and small short ones. Curling my toes the pleasure was amazing and I soon found myself sliding down to meet Phil’s fingers as he moved them in and out of me. The fullness was exquisite and Phil’s encouraging word’s as I fucked myself on his fingers was enough to send me over the edge and I came with a loud cry on my stomach. Phil reached for a tissue and gently wiped my stomach off.

“Did you like that kitten? Oh but look your all soft.” Which wasn’t completely fair, as I had quite the stamina. I think my face said that too, because soon Phil was crooning, “Don’t worry I’m going to fuck you and get you nice and hard for me again.” He rolled the condom on, but not quick enough for my liking.

“Inside. Now.” I panted grabbing Phil’s hips and trying to push them closer.

“Whatever you want love” Phil positioned himself at my entrance and slowly pushed in.

“Faster Phil, I can take it” I demanded as Phil began to leisurely thrust into me.

“I know you can kitten, but I’ve been hard for hours, I’m not going to last long if you rush me.”

“I don’t want you to last” I cried “I want you to fuck me!”

“You know in that dress you looked like such a proper lady, but now I can see you’re just a whore” my cock hardened at his words. “Like that baby? Because that’s what you are, aren’t you; a whore. My beautiful whore, who’s desperate for my cock.”

“Oh God, please don’t stop” I mumbled clawing at his back. 

Phil picked up his pace and as he hit my prostate I could feel myself getting close again. Every thrust sent waves of pleasure through me, and Phil’s laboured breathing told me he was close. Locking onto my Addams apple I could feel him suck a giant purple mark and tenderly lick a trail up to my right earlobe. My stomach tightened as Phil’s hips stuttered and the filthy moan of my name as he came was music to my ears.

“You’re incredible” Phil whispered and stroked the side of my face.

“Right back at you” I tried not to draw attention to my erection, not wanting to ruin the moment but Phil soon caught on to my uncomfortable shifting.

“Here angel, let me get that for you” Sliding out of me gently Phil grasped my cock and began to pump up and down. “Come on baby, you can do it. Come for me; you look so beautiful when you do.”

For the second time I felt my balls tighten and I spilled into Phil’s hand. Panting I brought my lips to Phil’s for a sweet kiss. Smiling I laid my head back and pulled the covers up, waiting for Phil to join me. To my displeasure instead of snuggling in next to me after he cleaned himself off, Phil walked towards the mini fridge. Feeling lonely I traced patterns into the pillow next to me; no matter how much I loved him I would kill Phil if he ever told Natasha that I loved to cuddle after sex, I just didn’t feel right if I didn’t have Phil’s arms wrapped around me.

“What you doing darling?” I ask trying to sound nonchalant, but my voice gives away that I’m a little hurt.

“Oh kitten don’t worry I’m coming right back, I just have a surprise for you. Close your eyes.” He ordered as he bent over to remove something from the fridge.

Keeping my eyes firmly shut I listened to Phil’s steps along the carpet and felt my heart race as the bed dipped.

“Open your eyes Clint” the love in Phil’s voice was evident.  
To my joy in front of me sat an entire box of éclairs! Phil bought me éclairs! He must have heard me at the ball and had some delivered here. Beaming I lunged for Phil’s mouth and soon our tongues were deliciously entwined. Breaking apart Phil picked up one of the pastries and brought it to my lips, and in that moment I knew I could tackle anything that was sent my way; as long as I had Phil beside me.


End file.
